The Letter

The following is an electronic copy of a partially charred letter I found very recently. it has been written by the President of the Waxworkers Union of India, whose name I omit owing to privacy concerns. Sadly it was impossible to identify the addressee due to the poor state the letter was in.
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'....And you know the emotional attachment I, and everybody else associated with the candle trade in this country, feel vis a vis Rang De Basanti. It is undoubtedly a white man's conspiracy to not nominate it for the academy award for the best foreign language film; an instance of racism worse than even what dear Shilpa has had to face in england. But what can you do to people living on foreign shores, when even compatriots let you down? All those critics who dare to point out that 'basically any merit that RDB had was limited to the first half, and that it went off the boil very badly in the last hour or so'. They say it became slow, it lost direction after the intermission. Eh how my blood boils thinking about them and about their fancy talk, nonsense such as "giving negative direction to the youth", or "encouraging fatalism".

Is it not true that it has captured the hearts and minds of middle class youth like nothing else in the past decade? is it not true that if you sign onto social networking sites, you'd see RDB listed as one of the favourite movies of all those who aspire to the title of "intellectual"? Was it not the film that brought out the middle class from their cosy homes and gave a meaning and direction to their lives? We WON justice for Mattoo, for Jessica, and also myraid other forms of justice. We went so far as lighting candles at Jantar Mantar to protest the Nithari Carnage [you ask what were we protesting against ? well, uh oh ummmm....].

How often do you see movies that benefit everybody at once - increase news channel TRPs, give the middle classes a much needed intellectual workout, pander to nationalist and patriotic interests, lambast lousy politicians, and most importantly benefit a sector as neglected as the Candle Industry? Such social senstivity! Who cares for the Candle Industry anymore? A great national treasure, and one of the candlebearers of our cottage industries is being allowed to die, in face of stiff opposition from such decadent inventions as electricty, and the perceptible decline in the popularity of candle-light dinners.

Lets protest against this gross injustice committed by the oscar jury - send the SMSs, write blog entries, flood websites with spam, rouse the media-coordinators, assemble at Jantar Mantar or India Gate, CALL THE MEDIA And LIGHT THE CANDLES! Long live the Candle Light Movement! mom* Salaam!'

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The remainder of the letter had gone up in flames.
*I don't think the writer is referring to anybody's mother.